Maureen joins BB house

After five years of trying to select the perfect housemate, producers at Big Brother have decided to let the contestants have a go.

17:32 22 June 2004

After five years of trying to select the perfect housemate, producers at Big Brother have decided to let the contestants have a go.

And that is how Maureen entered the house.

Their newest friend was created after Nadia's breasts, Jason's bum, Michelle's face, Vanessa's arms, Shell's legs, Stu's sixpack, and Dan' ears and feet, were covered in plaster and added to a wire frame.

Of course one piece, and one housemate was missing from the project.

Without access to Ahmed the housemates modelled a willy from one of the rather saucy wall protuberances.

Stu decided that the best thing to do would be to claim they took a mould of Ahmed's member while he was sleeping - if he ever asked.

The fun was far from over, though, and today they painted the plaster model.

Maureen now has stockings and suspenders, a crucifix, a tattoo on her back, red lipstick, and red hair.

"I think she looks pretty normal," commented Vanessa, assuming in the sight of a plaster lady-boy with stockings and suspenders was commonplace.

While Big Brother has let the housemates keep their latest friend, he said that Maureen needed clothing.

"It's 'cos of the willy, innit?" said Victor.