Blonde bombsite

There has been a fall out among one of the strongest alliances in the Big Brother house.

12:36 23 June 2004

There has been a fall out among one of the strongest alliances in the Big Brother house.

Vanessa and Jay have been at each other's throats, and Shell has admitted to wanting to nominate the burley Scot, as the blonde alliance crumbles.

Speaking to house mediator Dan, Ness said of Jason: "He walks around with such a big mope, mope, mope. What gives [him] the right to be a complete moody t****r?"

"He's wearing thin now," the South African added. "I don't appreciate the 'I need a hug' and then he won't ever speak to me.

"The food [which Ness cooked] wasn't great tonight but there's no thank you. He just eats and goes away."

The clock on this blonde was ticking, and last night Ness confronted her wannabe paramour.

After a day of mutterings and giggling between Victor and Jason she exploded: "I don't want to be your guy joke!"

The muscle-man replied: "You've been around too many w*****s, you can't tar all guys with the same brush.

"I would never, ever be nasty," he added.

She replied: "[Then] why are using that w****r tone?"

Jay then tried a different tack.

"Vanessa, love of my life, apple of my eye, is there anything else you want to talk about?" he oozed.

Eventually Ness, after labelling the 30-year-old "condescending", calmed down; having decided that she had aired her grievances.

Amazingly (considering his considerable bulk) Jay managed to then put his foot in his mouth.

"I accept your apology," the man with the award-winning rear closed - implying that he has never met a girl before.

"I wasn't apologising!" screamed Vanessa, throwing herself in fury at the trainee air steward.

Dear, dear. I wonder if they will have made up by next Friday, when all signs point to them being able to conduct the conversation in the outside world.

Shell's going to need new friends. . .