"Is there a doctor in the house? My parents want me to marry you."
"A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person."
Mignon McLaughlin on Marriage"By all means, marry. If you get a good wife, you'll become happy if you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher."
Socrates on Marriage"It is not a lack of love, but a lack of friendship that makes unhappy marriages."
Friedrich Nietzsche on Marriage"How can a woman be expected to be happy with a man who insists on treating her as if she were a perfectly normal human being."
Oscar Wilde on Marriage"Don't marry the person you think you can live with marry only the individual you think you can't live without."
James C. Dobson on Marriage"I think there have always been funny women, from Carol Burnett to Joan Rivers. When the audience sees a woman, they innately know she's worked twice as hard to get there, she's had to prove that she can be the leader, first, and then be funny on top of it. She has to emit a confidence that she's in control."
"I don't think I was funny until college. I lived with some Harvard MD/PhD students - they were so smart, and what I contributed to the house was, I was the funny one."
"My mom was a ventriloquist and she always was throwing her voice. For ten years I thought the dog was telling me to kill my father."
"I took an acting class. After the first day, the teacher quit, so they said take another. When I saw 'How to be a Stand-up Comedian,' it resonated. I realized I'd rather make 200 people laugh than make one person cry."