"An interim government was set up in Afghanistan. It included two women, one of whom was Minister of Women's Affairs. Man, who'd she have to show here ankles to to get that job?"
"A woman is like a tea bag - you can't tell how strong she is until you put her in hot water."
Eleanor Roosevelt on Women"I don't know who invented high heels, but all women owe him a lot."
Marilyn Monroe on Women"Ah, women. They make the highs higher and the lows more frequent."
Friedrich Nietzsche on Women"The age of a woman doesn't mean a thing. The best tunes are played on the oldest fiddles."
Ralph Waldo Emerson on Women"As usual, there is a great woman behind every idiot."
John Lennon on Women"I am constantly amazed by Tina Fey. And I am Tina Fey."
"A Harvard Medical School study has determined that rectal thermometers are still the best way to tell a baby's temperature. Plus, it really teaches the baby who's boss."
"Most of the time you're too busy to think about it. But every now and then you say, 'I work at 'Saturday Night Live,' and that is so cool."
"Mary Tyler Moore was a working woman whose story lines were not always about dating and men. They were about work friendships and relationships, which is what I feel my adult life has mostly been about."
"I work, and then whenever I have any other time, I'm with my daughter, and then I go to sleep. I think you basically have to abandon the dreams of having any other adult activities in your life. You have to go to sleep whenever your child goes to sleep. That's basically how we're doing it."