"Buying a car used to be an experience so soul-scorching, so confidence-splattering, so existentially rattling that an entire car company was based on the promise that you wouldn't have to come in contact with it."
"If GM had kept up with technology like the computer industry has, we would all be driving $25 cars that got 1,000 MPG."
Bill Gates on Car"There was a time in my life when I thought I had everything - millions of dollars, mansions, cars, nice clothes, beautiful women, and every other materialistic thing you can imagine. Now I struggle for peace."
Richard Pryor on Car"Car designers are just going to have to come up with an automobile that outlasts the payments."
Erma Bombeck on Car"I hooked up my accelerator pedal in my car to my brake lights. I hit the gas, people behind me stop, and I'm gone."
Steven Wright on Car"I replaced the headlights in my car with strobe lights, so it looks like I'm the only one moving."
Steven Wright on Car"I once had a boyfriend who couldn't write unless he was wearing a necktie and a dress shirt, which I thought was really weird, because this was a long time ago, and no one I knew ever wore dress shirts, let alone neckties it was like he was a grown-up reenacter or something."
"One of my favorite activities as a teen-ager was to watch television over the phone with my best friend."
"My ace in the hole as a human being used to be my capacity for remembering birthdays. I worked at it. Whenever I made a new friend, I made a point of finding out his or her birthday early on, and I would record it in my Filofax calendar."
"I want a chainsaw very badly, because I think cutting down a tree would be unbelievably satisfying. I have asked for a chainsaw for my birthday, but I think I'll probably be given jewelry instead."
"I want to let my friend Buster know that I would like to have dinner with him tonight. Does Buster work at home? Then how likely is he to have his cell phone on? Is he one of those people who only turns on his cell when he's in his car? I hate that."