"And then before going back for my sophomore year, I decided to change my major to arts and sciences, and my dad cut a deal with me: He said if I'd quit school he'd pay my rent for the next three years, as if I were in school."
"It is easier for a father to have children than for children to have a real father."
Pope John XXIII on Dad"When one has not had a good father, one must create one."
Friedrich Nietzsche on Dad"My father? I never knew him. Never even seen a picture of him."
Eminem on Dad"I am not ashamed to say that no man I ever met was my father's equal, and I never loved any other man as much."
Hedy Lamarr on Dad"Whoever does not have a good father should procure one."
Friedrich Nietzsche on Dad"I like my life alone."
"Well, I'm not afraid to say something if I think it's funny, even if it's harsh or racist."
"But I think you can make fun of anything as long as it's funny enough."
"I mean, I talk about being Jewish a lot. It's funny because I do think of myself as Jewish ethnically, but I'm not religious at all. I have no religion."
"Some people say my humor focuses too much on stereotypes. It doesn't. It focuses on facts."