"A few years ago I was at a party and this guy threw me over his shoulder, ran across the street, put me in his car, and stuck his tongue in my mouth."
"If GM had kept up with technology like the computer industry has, we would all be driving $25 cars that got 1,000 MPG."
Bill Gates on Car"There was a time in my life when I thought I had everything - millions of dollars, mansions, cars, nice clothes, beautiful women, and every other materialistic thing you can imagine. Now I struggle for peace."
Richard Pryor on Car"Car designers are just going to have to come up with an automobile that outlasts the payments."
Erma Bombeck on Car"I hooked up my accelerator pedal in my car to my brake lights. I hit the gas, people behind me stop, and I'm gone."
Steven Wright on Car"I replaced the headlights in my car with strobe lights, so it looks like I'm the only one moving."
Steven Wright on Car"I envy the sensibility in Europe, appreciating beauty in women as they age. I'm going to go that way. I might dye my gray hair for a bit, but beyond that the buck stops. I'm not having any work done."
"My quick beauty tip is always have a tinted gloss of some kind to give you some color even if you have no makeup on."
"I think beauty comes from within, and society paints a ridiculous picture."
"My daily beauty regimen consists of washing my face before bed and putting on moisturizer."
"My unusual beauty tip is that I often use Vaseline to take my make up off. It works great and is good for sensitive skin."