"I used to watch 'The Waltons' and sob because my family was nothing like that. We had a cruel sense of humor in my family."
"A joke is a very serious thing."
Winston Churchill on Humor"Humor is mankind's greatest blessing."
Mark Twain on Humor"Common sense and a sense of humor are the same thing, moving at different speeds. A sense of humor is just common sense, dancing."
William James on Humor"If I had no sense of humor, I would long ago have committed suicide."
Mahatma Gandhi on Humor"A person without a sense of humor is like a wagon without springs. It's jolted by every pebble on the road."
Henry Ward Beecher on Humor"The wages of sin are death, but by the time taxes are taken out, it's just sort of a tired feeling."
"I don't have a bank account because I don't know my mother's maiden name."
"I'm thankful for the three ounce Ziploc bag, so that I have somewhere to put my savings."
"I have a very silly sense of humor. I've never laughed harder in my entire life than seeing someone with toilet paper stuck on the bottom of their shoe."
"My Mom said she learned how to swim when someone took her out in the lake and threw her off the boat. I said, 'Mom, they weren't trying to teach you how to swim.'"