"I guess now that I think back, I used to play priest and be a funny priest. I don't know, I grew up in such a Catholic family that I kind of liked to test the boundaries a little bit and I think I had fun watching my mom laugh."
"A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man."
Lana Turner on Funny"I believe that if life gives you lemons, you should make lemonade... And try to find somebody whose life has given them vodka, and have a party."
Ron White on Funny"A word to the wise ain't necessary - it's the stupid ones that need the advice."
Bill Cosby on Funny"Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes."
Jim Carrey on Funny"Do not take life too seriously. You will never get out of it alive."
Elbert Hubbard on Funny"Why should 20-year-olds only be considered sexy? I think we get better with age."
"Craziest thing I've done for love is getting married. I think it's crazy. I think it's crazy, crazy, crazy. I'm never going to say I wouldn't do it again but I have to make sure it's love and not settling for the 'I have to do this by a certain age,' which is kind of what I did."
"I do believe sadly it's going to take some diseases coming back to realize that we need to change and develop vaccines that are safe."
"My philosophy of dating is to just fart right away."
"The one thing I like about 'Playboy' is they don't have the anorexic look. The women are voluptuous. So I didn't really want to diet. I just wanted to tone up."