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Famous Quotes

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"It is a scientific fact that your body will not absorb cholesterol if you take it from another person's plate."

Dave Barry on Funny

More quotes about Funny

  • "A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man."

    Lana Turner on Funny

  • "I believe that if life gives you lemons, you should make lemonade... And try to find somebody whose life has given them vodka, and have a party."

    Ron White on Funny

  • "A word to the wise ain't necessary - it's the stupid ones that need the advice."

    Bill Cosby on Funny

  • "Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes."

    Jim Carrey on Funny

  • "Do not take life too seriously. You will never get out of it alive."

    Elbert Hubbard on Funny

More quotes by Dave Barry

  • "The one thing that unites all human beings, regardless of age, gender, religion or ethnic background, is that we all believe we are above-average drivers."

  • "The information encoded in your DNA determines your unique biological characteristics, such as sex, eye color, age and Social Security number."

  • "It was Public Art, defined as art that is purchased by experts who are not spending their own personal money."

  • "Camping is nature's way of promoting the motel business."

  • "Big business never pays a nickel in taxes, according to Ralph Nader, who represents a big consumer organization that never pays a nickel in taxes."

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