"My parents and grandparents have always been engaged in teaching or the medical profession or the priesthood, so I've sort of grown up with a sense of complicity in the lives of other people, so there's no virtue in that it's the way one is raised."
"I'm not feeling very well - I need a doctor immediately. Ring the nearest golf course."
Groucho Marx on Medical"A hospital bed is a parked taxi with the meter running."
Groucho Marx on Medical"Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died."
Erma Bombeck on Medical"They certainly give very strange names to diseases."
Plato on Medical"Getting out of the hospital is a lot like resigning from a book club. You're not out of it until the computer says you're out of it."
Erma Bombeck on Medical"I think it's quite extraordinary that people cast me as if I'm Warren Beatty: until I met my present wife, at the age of 35, you could name two girlfriends."
"One of my grandfathers, actually, having gone out there as a minister, decided he would better serve the people as a doctor. So at a very late age - at the age of 38 in fact - he changed course and decided to become a doctor."
"I absolutely don't care about my looks and I'm so used to them that I wouldn't change a thing. I would end up missing my defects."
"If you don't mind haunting the margins, I think there is more freedom there."
"I always thought the biggest failing of Americans was their lack of irony. They are very serious there! Naturally, there are exceptions... the Jewish, Italian, and Irish humor of the East Coast."